Finding Closure

A writer went forth to sow and as she sowed, some of her words fell among thorns…and sprang up into a 100-word story dealing with some harsh realities of life. I don’t know why such a peaceful scene should rake up such a memory, but here’s my thorny tale for this week’s Friday Fictioneers prompt. This dialogue is based on an extremely sad but true incident.

My thanks to our Prompt (in both senses) Chief Planter, Rochelle, for hosting our group, and to Jan Fields for the prompt photo. I really appreciate this opportunity to slice, chop, whittle and otherwise abbreviate until I (hopefully) have absolutely chaff-less grain to present at the FF Global Fair.

My apologies if I’m really slow getting around to checking out offerings at the other booths. I’m in final-revision mode for my first book and assembling another.

Photo © Jan Wayne Fields

Finding Closure

“So who found the remains?”

“Some teens on a camping trip, scrounging firewood,” Corporal Patel replied.

“Poor kids. They’ll need some strong knock-out drops tonight.”

“We figured he’d been offed. Anonymous tip got us his car. No contact, no bank withdrawals or credit card used since he disappeared.”

“Possible motives?” Sgt Zelinski hated cold cases.

“Friends say he was dealing. So… Couldn’t pay up? Turf war? Disgruntled buyer? We’ll likely never know unless we get somebody’s deathbed confession. His family’s been through seven months of hell; at least they have closure now.”

Zelinski nodded. “At this point that’s what’s really important.”

Advertisements

46 thoughts on “Finding Closure

    • It was very hard on the family but they were relieved to finally know.

      I hope this chopping, cutting, slicing, and whittling will stand me in good stead for later stories. I thought I could become a best-selling author to pay for my hearing aids, but hadn’t figured in the cost of formatting. Anyone want to buy a kidney, slightly used but good for maybe another 20 years? 😉

      Like

      • I cannot even imagine that…nor would I want to!

        As for the chopping et al it sure served its purpose and will continue to do so here at FF.

        The best-selling author thing can still happen. I dream of one day getting my ducks in a row for the same purpose!!

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Oh my God! Such a tragedy to be discovered like that.
    And , great writing , as always.
    All my good wishes with the book, Christine . May it be a best seller!

    Like

    • It would be a tragedy — and hard for the young people, too. Thanks for your compliments and good wishes for my book. A book of poems and short stories isn’t likely to become a best seller, but I’d be happy to get back more my investment in this. Thinking of a print book (and following poor advice!) I bought graphics. As it stands now the few graphics I’m using come free from Pixabay.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Hmm. Sorry about that monetary loss but then that’s unfortunately a part of this publishing deal , right? Is this your first solo anthology .?
        Best wishes…

        Like

      • Hi Moon, thanks again for your comment. Yes, this was my first anthology, my first attempt at publishing back in 2013.
        “Live and learn” —and the lessons usually cost something. Or maybe a person could say, “The lessons we remember are the ones that dent our wallets as well as our brains.” 😉

        Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, they waited a number of years actually to find out what happened to him. He came from a sensible home but the family thought he was into drugs — and the drug trade is a river floating with the bodies of young people who tried to keep up with the big bad boys.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Dialogue is one of the hardest things to master. I’ve been writing for 40 years and I still struggle with it so don’t let it bother you too much. It’ll get easier with practice. Sometimes, talking it out (as in actually speaking it) with someone else like you’re reading a script helps. I used to read it into a tape recorder and then play it back. It really helped.

        Like

  2. Dear Christine,

    Sad, dark and too true to life.who knows why the muse takes us where she does with any given photo. This struck a nerve for it’s reminiscent of a case in our area. After ten years the family of a young victim finally has closure. Very well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

  3. Good, fluent story-telling. Personally I would have liked a tiny bit more about the family’s ordeal near the start of the story. Perhaps you could have the mother pestering the cops every day rather than the youngsters needing strong knock-out drops?
    You’re definitely on top of the dialogue, which is taut and believable.

    Like

  4. Too many lost their life like that, so sad, but I wonder how many cases are never solved because they assume that he was dealing or similar things. I listened to a podcast about “Mountain Jane Doe”… it took many many years to even find who was killed.

    Like

    • You’re right: a lot of crimes aren’t solve. And it could be the police know exactly who did what, but they can’t find the body. They can’t charge anyone without having a body. On the other hand it’s amazing how new evidence may suddenly turn up on some “cold case” and the police are able to solve it years later.

      Like

I'd like to hear your thoughts on this. Please leave a comment.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s