Officer Chan Forbister noticed a car ahead weaving erratically and crowding the cars in either lane. Turning on his flashers he came up behind it and saw the driver writhing in her seat. A moment of panic hit him. “Was she having a heart attack? A seizure?”
But when he pulled alongside the other car, the woman straightened up in her seat and gave him an embarrassed smile. One of those multi-tasking drivers again. He sighed and signaled her to pull over.
Standing by her car, Chan eyed her critically. “Are you okay, lady?”
“Of course I am, Officer.”
“I thought you were having a seizure. What exactly were you doing?”
“This is so embarrassing! You see, I snagged my pantihose leaving the house and now I’ve a huge hole. I can’t show up at the office looking like this, so I was trying to take them off.”
“While driving?” Chan rolled his eyes. “May I see your driver’s licence and registration, ma’am.”
He walked back to his cruiser, spent a few minutes on his radio confirming the registration information, then returned, ticket in hand.
“I see you had another driving infraction last month?”
“Quite a minor offence, really.”
“Blowing up balloons while driving ten kilometers over the speed limit on a main street is minor? Now that’s funny.”
“They were for my granddaughter’s birthday party and I was running late.”
Chan put on his sternest cop face as he handed her the ticket. “From now on, lady, when you’re driving forget about multi-tasking. When you’re driving, JUST DRIVE! We don’t want to see you in the morgue.”
“Yes, officer,” she answered meekly.
He climbed into his cruiser and watched her drive away. Then he chuckled, remembering the reactions at last month’s staff meeting when Officer Vennie told them about the ticket he’d given this balloon-blowing grannie. Chan shook his head. Just wait ‘til the guys heard this one.