Short and Stout Are Out

The Ragtag Daily Prompt word today is TEAPOT.
Forgive me, dear readers. I couldn’t resist….

“I’m A Little Teapot…”

Belle lifted the pot to pour tea for her friend and couldn’t resist singing that old rhyme, “I’m a little teapot short and stout…”

“Hold on,” Mia squawked. “That is so NOT PC! You can’t say short and stout. Now we say vertically challenged and horizontally expanded.”

“Eh? Oh. What about tall and slim then?”

“Oh, those are okay. Nothing derogatory about tall and slim.”

“All right then. ‘I’m a little teapot, tall and slim; here is my handle, here is my brim. When I get all steamed up…’ Er…can you still say steamed up? It may imply ill-tempered, which would be derogatory.”

Mia considered this. “I think steamed up will still pass. Pour the tea.”

Bella sighed. “We may have to examine every adjective in the dictionary. All a wodge of baloney, I say.”

“Don’t say baloney. The suggestion might bother a vegan. Rather say tofu. Now pour our tea. I’m thirsty.”

“Are you sure we should even be drinking tea? Are the tea plantation workers in Pakistan being paid fairly? Are we contributing to the exploitation…”

Mia waved her hand impatiently. “Don’t go there. Just pour the…er…incarnadine tea.”

“You’ve got me thinking now…”

“Foolish me.”

Note:

  • I discovered the “British informal” word WODGE just yesterday over at Lexico, and wanted to work it into a story soon. Cross between a wad and a wedge, it means a hunk, a chunk, a bulky mass. I think it’s still PC.

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